Monday, March 22, 2004
The other night as I was leaving a bar, this guy tries to pick me up or something by telling me within the first 45 seconds that he works for Roc-A-Fella Records. While I suppose said guy met his objective by capturing my attention for 3 entire minutes, this whole incident makes the Fat Asian Baby wax philosophical about the bar pick-up strategies that guys apparently learn in guy-school. Congratulations, your opening lines worked; I'm paying attention. But why are you interested in a shameless star-fucker like the Fat Asian Baby who is so easily impressed by your name dropping and necessarily implied promises of eating waffles in Atlanta with Kanye West. A word to the wise, your supposedly impressive opener is only going to work on someone who's, well, impressed by that sort of thing and wouldn't otherwise talk to you. In any other case, she's likely to wonder why you're playing the Roc-A-Fella Records card so early in the conversation. Highly suspect, my friends.