Fat Asian Baby

So I came home about an hour ago after having spent all my waking hours struggling through various equations and numbers. Needless to say I was quite cranky, rather hungry, but not in the mood to go grocery shopping and even less in the mood to crack open yet another can of tunafish. Being true to my New York roots, I decided that this situation called for delivery of some sort. But being a poor grad student, I have avoided delivery or dining out like the plague, and apparently with great success as a ransacking of the menu drawer produced only one measly menu. FAB proceeded to call said establishment only to be informed that despite having delivered a takeout menu, they do not, in fact, deliver food. So next FAB calls friend A. who has lived in Atlanta for several years to inquire about places in the neighborhood that might deliver. Apparently the answer is only some Chinese/Mexican restaurant a couple of miles away. Since I did not have a menu to peruse myself, and I've eaten burritos for something like my last 13 out of 18 meals, I decided to go for Chinese. The Fat Asian Baby actually despises Chinese food but decided perhaps a MooShoo chicken wouldn't be so bad since it comes in a pancake and is sorta like eating a burrito. Well, let me just say, apparently I am a failed Asian AND Jew because I managed to bungle the Chinese takeout order so much so that when I opened the bag, I was greated by a greasy container of Chicken LoMein. What sort of self-respecting New York Jew doesn't know the difference from her LoMein and her MooShoo? Apparently an Asian one.