Fat Asian Baby

A year or two ago, the Donald decided to build huge luxury high-rise buildings geared towards young professionals in FAB's very own boring-as-nuts hometown while FAB snorted incredulously at the suggestion that young single professionals would choose to live in a boring-as-nuts suburban city rather than nearby New York. Well, I suppose it shouldn't come as an altogether tremendous shock that the Donald knows something about real estate markets that the Fat Asian Baby does not. It seems that half the apartments are already spoken for even though one of the buildings isn't even done yet. FAB wonders how much the Big D. had to bribe ole Bill to get him to live here instead of in one of the shinier buildings in Manhattan. Although it would be sweet living upstairs from Target and now we finally have our own movie theater, for the record, if I were a young, single professional with some degree of money to burn, I still wouldn't choose this over New York. For starters, White Plains is home to a whopping total of about six (read 'em six) bars. Maybe Bill isn't bothered by the paltry downtown nightlife since his chauffeur can shuttle him to and from the real party in New York, but the rest of us know that the MetroNorth railroad stops running by 1am.