Wednesday, September 28, 2005


Have you ever noticed how you can be sitting down and your nose is utterly, totally, and completely filled with snot, so you stand up to get a tissue and miracle of miracles, as surely as God parted the Red Sea to let his children escape the grips of Pharoah, it's like "Where the hell do you think you're going, foolish one? There's no snot here." So you sit back down again. Yet the second that you bend at the knee and plant you butt, lo do those floodwaters come rushing back as though to drown an entire generation of brave Egyptian warriors, clogging your nostrils, and utterly totally and completely impeding your respiratory efforts? What's up with that?

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