Monday, October 17, 2005

Chicken and Buns 

The chicken cutlet conversation of last week (see item 6 and comments) caused one of FAB's age old questions to resurface. As our good friend Johnny pointed out, FAB has more than adequate bosoms thank you very much. And we've been this way for quite some time, since, say, seventh grade or so. Over the years we've sympathized with our less well-endowed friends' efforts to enhance their assets, but we've never quite understood the underlying logic assumed by boobie enhancer manufacturers and enthusiasts alike. If the boobie enhancers are meant to enhance the boobie effect, thereby attracting men's attention, and thereby leading to a little bumpity bumpity, as it were, what happens if this scheme is successful? What happens when the guy comes home with you, you're going hot and heavy, and you've got your chicken cutlets hanging out in your bra or you're sporting one of those water bras that Grace wore in that one episode of Will and Grace? I mean, the truth is bound to come out at some point. Heretofor FAB has always assumed that this practice of padding assets was the unique domain of modestly breasted females. But whoa were we mistaken.
I present to you, the Problem Solvers Underwear section of the International Male catalogue. FAB was particularly tickled by the circular butt pads on the underwear pictured at left. Granted, I am not actually a gay man (not that there's anything wrong with that), but boy does that make me H-O-T!

We highly recommend a full perusal of the entire catalogue. You will not be disappointed. Please do not ask us how we came into possession of this catalogue. It has something to do with Joe's Coffee in East Atlanta, but we're not exactly sure what, how, or why.

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