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Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Did I Mention That Mine Also Comes With A Pool? 

I love New York City dearly and I won't bore you with the details, but I recently overheard/participated in a conversation with a friend who is currently looking for a place to live. (For those of you new to Fat Asian Baby's life I should preface by saying this conversation took place in our newly adopted city of Atlanta). She'd found the perfect place, but "it's really, really expensive."
"Oooh, how much?"
"Like $650 a month."
Collective whistling through the teeth and other non-verbal explanations of disbelief.

Contrast this to dear friend Drone's apartment-hunting experience back in the Big Apple:
Drone: Hi, I'm calling about the advertised $1,200 studio...

Bloodsucking Vulture: How much do you make?

Drone: I'm sorry?

Bloodsucking Vulture: How much do you make?!

Drone: [divulging information]

Bloodsucking Vulture: Sorry, you're a bad candidate. You need to make 90 times the monthly rent.

Drone: Sorry. Not to be rude [right], but what kind of asshole making $108,000 a year (i.e., 90 times $1,200) wants to live in a 150 square foot studio on the lower east side...

Bloodsucking Vulture: [silence... then] Click


Yes I remember that fundamental New York real estate conundrum and no I don't miss it.

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