Monday, October 10, 2005

Don't You Be Messing With My Hypothetical Asian Friends 

Over the weekend, I received several more emails from our good friend, Johnny.
The last of which was this fine message:
Subject: you got any asian friends witth bigger tits?
Body: and thats likes really really big dicks? like thick too, like can deal with some pain

I would like to pretend that I'm a mature adult now*, but that's just not the case. I simply will not have any braided belt wearing assclown who lives in his parents' wood-panelled basement messing with friends that I may or may not even have. So I finally caved. And responded in kind:
Subject: RE: you got any asian friends witth bigger tits?
Body: asian women don't really like big dicks that much. because a lot of asian women are small, in a lot of asian cultures big dicks are considered freakish or defective.
anyway, i think you might find this amusing.

Dear John



I am anxiously awaiting his response.

*Though according to our good friends at the NY Times, FAB happily inhabits the post-teenage wasteland of emerging adulthood and is actually exempt from behaving like a grown-up at least until next year. Thanks guys.

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