Fat Asian Baby

Tonight check out Mantissa, Slushco, and Ester Drang at the Earl.

Miss Smith goes to Washington. And we must admit, she's looking pretty good.

Bob Ritchie still doing what he does best, though we're not entirely sure just what that is.

Vote in Paste Magazine's 100 Best Living Songwriters poll.

Tapes 'n Tapes: Best New Music.

You knew it had to happen sooner or later, the Dick Cheney action figure, complete with shotgun.

Smithsonian plans hip hop history exhibit.

TV on the Radio jump ship for Interscope.

Ludacris to guest on SVU.

Did Paris get a boob job?

The New York Times meets the New Republic's new editor. How new.

Watch video of college kids discovering what happens when you actually do 55 mph on the Perimeter.

Angelina has Brad by the nuts.

Rolling Stones plan big ass concert in China.

The Editors and Stellstarr* will be swinging by the 40 Watt on April 6th.

Usher encounter has all the makings of a good romance novel: "But he took me by surprise when he doubled back and thrust his finger in my face — his long manicured nail lightly grazing the tip of my nose."

Pete Doherty does something you'll never guess what it is but here's a clue it's something he's done before. Whoa.

James Frey, JD Salinger, and Thomas Pynchon, all in one delusional sentence.

Newsday get their third impression of the Strokes.

Is Hohan reverting?

Some British actress claims the perfect breasts must be up, perky, and round like a pair plastic half melons strapped to your chest.

Masster P faces trial for gun charges.

In a clear departure from her everyday life, Britney celebrates Fat Tuesday.

Janice Dickinson. Discuss.

Pitchfork tackles Merle Haggard. Or is it the other way around?

The Sex Pistols have words with the Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame.

In other news, chocolate linked to lower blood pressure.

FAB sketchy doppelganger poses with her ridiculous book, ridiculous coat, and don't get us started on the earings.

Today is National Pancake Day. Get a free short stack at IHOP from 7am to 2pm in exchange for a donation to First Book.

Homophobic and quite possibly mentally challenged Clay Aiken fans want their money back after meeting of the minds with Captain Obvious.

Kate Moss gets cozy with rollerskating king Albert Hammond, Jr.

State and local officials opt for NASCAR Hall of Fame over sweet Calatrava home for ASO. FAB wants to kick them in the teeth.

NYTimes Mag takes a really long time to talk about the scene shifting indie music coming out of Canadia. I think they might be onto something here. Like a eighteen months ago.

Watch Panda kindergarten video. FAB wants a baby panda.

Watch Colin Meloy singing in an elevator. FAB wants face time.

Robert Pollard talks to PopMatters about his side project.

MC Hammer has a blog, which, for those of you who don't know is like a kind of online journal or media outlet that is generally devoid of any sort of journalistic standards.

Britney Spears: class act.

KFed: still thinks he's black.

Paris (the city) panoramas.

George Michael jumps on the bandwagon.

Petra Nemcova pulls the oldest trick in the book.

Ciao Milano. Hello Brooklyn?

Drew Lachey wins Dancing with the Stars even though he's not actually a star.

Watch homemade We Are Scientists video.

Dining with giraffes.

Chloe Sevigny says she's uncomfortable with sex scenes unless they're necessary, doesn't explain thematic significance of Brown Bunny.

Fake Scientists talk Aesoteric Records, MySpace, OEM radio, and labels.

Art Frahm in goth.

Rufus Wainwright to cover Judy Garland, natch.

Sheryl Crow undergoes surgery for breast cancer.

Brad and Angelina register at Tiffanys.

Tonight FAB recommends the Black Rebel Motorcycle Club show at the Roxy with Elefant.

David Beckham is a rock. And it seems that the old boy can't speak English either. (Though FAB has previously noted how the English aren't real big on, uh, English anyway.) This story is all kinds of funny on so many unintended levels. We can't even begin to imagine what the dinner table conversation must be like in the Beckham/Spice household. That is, if Vicky even goes through the motions of sitting down at a table in a room with lots of food for an activity ostensibly oriented around eating.

It probably bears mentioning that I spent $60 on Jager shots Saturday night. I think I knocked a screw loose somewhere.

Tonight FAB recommends checking out local goodies Harrison Hudson, Morning State, and Sovus Radio at the 10 High.

FAB also recommends checking out Luigi and Moresight who will be supporting Untied States' CD release at the Earl. Cable and Tweed has some track samples from Untied States and Luigi.

Also, the newly reunited Californias will be playing at the Velvet Underground with some other bands that we variously don't know or cannot endorse but we won't say which is which.

Willie Nelson will be at the Tabernacle.

And while we don't endorse either show, we've been waiting all day just to tell you that Scott Stapp will be at the Roxy tonight and that Kid Rock will be at the Gwinnett Arena tomorrow night. Boom.

But seriously folks, tomorrow FAB recommends the Gates of Berlin, Ocha La Rocha, and Variac at Vinyl.

FAB would like to give a big shout out to the women's bathroom at the Masquerade for winning the prestigious prize in the category of "Most Disgusting Bathroom We've Experienced Since Residing in Atlanta." While the Masquerade bathroom certainly wasn't the foulest one we've ever seen, half of the bathroom experience is about expectations. We've peed in some sketchy locations in Eastern Europe, Northern India, West Africa, the Middle East, and Southeast Asia that easily surpass the Masquerade in utter nastiness. However, we were so appalled last night that we nearly dropped our cookies on the floor during our first post-two-beer visit because we had no inkling whatsoever of the squalor we were about to encounter. None of FAB's subsequent visits were nearly as vomit-inducing as the first because, by then, I was much older and more worldly wise. However, let me tell you about that first, rather desperate visit. I confidently strode into the powder room as though I had the world on my shoulders and was immediately punched in the face with an odor that you might expect in the low-budget port-a-potty beside a seaside shrimp shack. I then had to look through each stall in the naive hope of finding one with toilet paper AND whose throne was not all pissed upon or bearing unwelcome leftover gifts of the unflushable variety. This mission was not accomplished, but I did finally manage to locate some toilet paper over by the sinks mere seconds before my bladder exploded.

And a lingering question, if you're one of those anal retentive yet still incompetent individuals who, quite understandably, does not want to touch your backside to the toilet seat yet also inexplicably lacks the aim and/or the quadriceps to master the hover-squat maneuver such that you must lay down a blanket of toilet paper on the seat, why then did you still insist on hovering, thereby completely saturating all of the toilet paper that, moments before, you had so lovingly and painstakingly draped over the seat? Or alternatively, if you weren't hovering then what the fuck happened in there?

And a big genuine thanks to Leah for capturing a picture of one of the stalls in all of its glory, a task that FAB clearly did not have the gag reflexes to undertake.

Newly available for the Earl:

03.20 Man Man / Parts & Labor
04.12 Arab Strap
04.21 Captured! by Robots
04.23 Lucero
05.15 Blood on the Wall
05.19 Grupo Fantasma.

Tickets available at the Earl and at Criminal Records in Little Five Points.

Also, tickets for the following shows are already on sale at Ticket Alternative:

03.01 The Subways at the Loft
03.20 The Magic Numbers / The Elected at the Loft
03.23 Eisley at Vinyl
03.28 She Wants Revenge / Nightmare of You at the Loft

For anyone who finds at least some modicum of pleasure in discovering sweet new music, particularly of the local variety, the place to be tonight is the Masquerade (I never thought I would utter such a sentiment). Yes, the Masquerade is where it's at. ASCAP is hosting a showcase of some of Atlanta's best new and newish talent that you should be listening to. Tonight's lineup starts at 7pm and features Tora Tora Tora, the Judies, the Futurists, and Snowden. This one won't keep you out past your bedtime so you really have no excuse.

KFed makes a new friend.

Mariano Rivera kicks it in New Ro.

Best Buy plays hardball with indie record stores.

Showtime picks up Arrested Development.

LA Times compares Jacko and Oscar Wilde.

Katie tries to free herself of those pesky traumatized alien spirits.

LA Zoo honors Golden Girl.

FAB scary doppelganger can't stop flapping her gums, signifying nothing.

The Vines talk Vision Valley.

GNR leaks to the internet.

L. Lo now "just friends" with Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Natch.

Nevermind revisited.

The Juan Maclean, Lady Sovereign, She Wants Revenge sign on for M3 Summit.

Daddy Yankee and Shakira headline tonight's Premio Lo Nuestro. FAB wants gasolina.

Another kid bites the dust.

Kid Rock and general public 1, World Wide Red Light District 0.

Modpod 27 features Matt Pond PA, Animal Collective, Explorers Club, etc.

Westchester Idol Becky O'Donohue poses for Maxim.

Carmen Electra and Victoria Silvstedt suck face for the French.

Big Gay Al's homosexuality starting to take a toll on marriage to Bridezilla.

Download the Break Up Pt. 2 at Up the Tree.

Tonight FAB recommends heading over to Smith's Olde Bar to hear the Fiery Furnaces and Deadboy and the Elephantmen.

Also, local acts the Cogburns and the Booze will be playing with Charlotte threesome Elevator Action at the Star Bar in Little Five Points.

Paris shows us her undies. In other news, Paris is actually wearing undies as opposed to, um, here (NSFW).

Test Icicles can't handle the heat.

Nick Denton and his ginormous head poised for world domination.

Waffle House joins the 20th century.

Watch the ATL trailer.

Roberto Cavalli on trial for fraud. No word on whether he will also be charged with defrauding the public into sporting his atrociously tacky line.

Jens Lekman gets back on the horse.

Pete Doherty photographed smoking crack. World shocked and deeply disappointed. Really.

Apparently we're still discussing whether or not Nicole Kidman is going to pull a Renee as if it's news.

Speaking of which, O Brother what art thou thinking?

Oyster traces New York social, economic, and environmental history.

Yeah Yeah Yeahs give an FU to the Southeast.

The AJC's live music picks.

GNR to headline UK Download festival.

Cable and Tweed talks Luigi.

H&H Bagels ready to be sliced.

Let's talk soup.

Former Killers manager sues for $16 mil.

Avril all growed up.

Two new podcasts at Indie Interviews: Tapes 'n Tapes and Catfish Haven.

Aquarium gets big ass reef fish.

NYTimes mag slideshow of 2005's great performers.

Kid Rock sues to stop the five people who haven't yet seen his sex romp with Scott Stapp and actually would pay money for the honor.

In related news, KissAtlanta shares everything you didn't necessarily want to know about Scott Stapp.

Thanks to a last minute intervention by Lillian at Criminal Records, FAB was able to make it to the Earl last night. While Electric Six was billed as the headliner, the real act to see was She Wants Revenge. Due to 99x's heavy rotation of the band's single, Tear You Apart, the show was packed with a drunken contingent that seemed to have made a wrong turn on its way to a Buckhead frat party. Despite the irritating grinding, jumping, bumping, and shouting of obnoxious concert-goers, She Wants Revenge delivered a decently solid set. Maybe the bands brought their own sound team, but for once, the sound at the Earl didn't seem as though it had been processed through a meat grinder and taken a tumble in the dryer before passing through the house amps. FAB wasn't blown away, but we enjoyed Justin Warfield's Paul Banksesque affectless delivery. Though to be honest, we'd still rather be with Paul.
Leah has a review of the surprisingly delightful first band, Rock Kills Kid.

Tonight the hot ticket in town is the sold out Electric Six show at the Earl featuring She Wants Revenge and Rock Kills Kid. If anyone has an extra ticket to this show, let me know.

Also, Common will be at the Tabernacle.

On Friday, after much aggravation, FAB finally had the wherewithal and, more importantly, the time to brave the Lenox Square Mall and venture back to the den of despair, the Apple Store. Despite the fact that I had made an appointment the night before for 2:30 that afternoon so I wouldn't have to wait, I waited for about 40 minutes before one of their geniuses would see me. (Sweet God, are we seriously expected to refer to their pimply employees as "geniuses" in the privacy of our own minds without so much as a snide sidelong sneer?) At any rate, after I bitched out said employee about how this was my third trip to an Apple establishment since Jan 1st of this year and how this iPod totally sucks dick and please all I want it to do is to transfer the music in my iTunes and then maybe play this music in the order that I suggest and if it isn't too much of a bother to maybe play each song in its entirety before moving onto the next if that's what pleases me and maybe I am an incompetent iPod parent but am I demanding too much of my iPod? The answer, it turns out, is no (to the last question, at least. I am probably incompetent nonetheless). Einstein took one look at me and promptly produced a brand new iPod which, I'm pleased to report, within an hour and a half of arriving home had managed to accomplish what the previous one had been unable to achieve in a month and a half of aggravation, hair pulling, and sorrow: it transfered my music, all measly 13 GB of it, and I have high hopes that it will actually play it. I think this might be love.

Afterword: Since you probably can't tell from the picture I stole off of Google images, my iPod is of the 40GB variety. Additionally, you most likely don't know the tragic details of the demise of FABiPod the First that involved the sacrifice of all 40 GB of my illegitimately obtained music. For those of us who don't do higher math, I have some 26-odd GB of virginal iPod territory just waiting to be defiled. Feel free to get involved. And many thanks to FABBro without whose intervention I would only have 3 GB. Kisses.

Halle at Hasty Pudding doing God knows what to her girls.

Stylus' Top Ten Music & Food/Drink Combo Meals.

Britney fears she's the next Princess Di. Snicker.

Daily Candy is coming to Atlanta. Bout time. Now all we need is Fresh Direct.

So um, Stereogum has the Stapp/Rock sex tape. Proceed at your own caution.

Scientists and Monkeys are friends.

Kylie's back.

Lisa Marie marries another Michael.

Somehow, despite being scheduled for a photo shoot for the cover of Vanity Fair, Keira Knightley didn't find it necessary to shave her legs beforehand. Gee, how down to earth of you Keira. I bet you also don't think you're attractive and gorge yourself on crumpets while not exercising, right?

Penis restaurant open for business in Beijing. Mmmm.

Pitchfork hearts Man Man.

Naomi Campbell strikes again.

Watch the Victoria Secret fashion show.

Guy falls off Buckhead balcony. Doesn't make it.

"They're everything wrong with culture, and everything wrong with art." - David LaChapelle, on Jessica and Ashlee Simpson. (via Popbitch). Wait, did he say art?

Georgia may ban pot flavored lollies.

Coldpoo billboard. (via What We All Want)

Tonight check out League of Evil, Slushco, and Heros Severum are at the Drunken Unicorn.

Also, the El Caminos' will be doing a reunion show with the Infernals and the Unsatisfied at the Earl.

Saturday, the show to catch is I am the World Trade Center, Boulevard, and Shock Cinema at the Earl.

The Kid Rock/Scott Stapp sex tape emerges. Yeah, you heard me" the Kid Rock/Scott Stapp SEX TAPE. Eeeeesh.

Looking for a good hearty chuckle? Check out the nominations for the Canadian Grammy's Juno Awards. Cause it's not like there's any good music coming out of Canada these days or anything like that. No siree!

Coldplay bows out? For now. The label strikes back.

RIAA shoves pole farther up collective ass.

UGA fucks up.

Bridget Moynihan still clinging to Tom Brady.

Mary Jane: Washington State's #8 agricultural commodity.

Kaiser Chiefs rule the Brits. The Sun's Brit Awards slideshow.

Prince demands purple carpet treatment.

Also spotted at the Brit Awards: Paris Hilton's boobies.

Some people thought Kelly Osbourne looked radiant. FAB agrees. But we can't help but wonder why one's awards show fake hair updo must also include a bow made out of fake hair? Was that really necessary?

Red Carpet photos from the event here.

Ogle Andy Roddick while he works out.

Colin Farrell crashes cop funeral in FAB's hometown.

The New Yorker checks out the Yeah Yeah Yeahs' new ditties.

Courtney Love sheds some weight.
Koch prefers fat. So does FAB. In other news, FAB wishes Fresh Direct would come to Atlanta.

Test Icicles mania at Pitchfork.

Two Atlantans in the American Idol top 24.

Get thee ready for the Inman Park Tree Huggers Ball.

Austin Ray takes on the Arctic Monkeys in Prefix.

XM Radio getting mauled by Sirius.

The whole Asian chick with white dude phenomenon isn't exactly new or unnoticed. These interacial couplings have frequently been the source of rampant angst and anger on the Craigslist's Rants and Raves section where posts have ranged from accusations about white guys essentializing Asian females in their supposed submissiveness to the conclusion that your average Asian chick is just hotter than your average white chick to self righteous proclamations that those Asian girls who date white guys are the bottom of the Twinkie barrel and could never score a self-respecting Asian guy if they wanted to. In Yellow Fever, a YouTube video that has been circulating the internet for a while, a couple Asian guys from UCSD take a look at what it takes for an Asian dude to nail a white chick. The video is a long (20 mins) but fairly amusing take (there are some pretty hilarious parts in the middle and the end is downright amazing) at the very real emasculation of Asian males in Western culture. One correction, FAB has NEVER NEVER NEVER found it attractive when white dudes come up and try and impress me by greeting me in some miscellaneous Asian language. Of course, FAB probably can't really talk to this whole phenomenon anyway since I'm not exactly doing my part to even the score.

The last decade or so has witnessed a virtual explosion of design-y high concept bathrooms popping up in establishments all over the world. And nobody has been more pleased about this bathroom trend than FAB. We have overactive kidneys or a pea-sized bladder depending upon who you ask, and spend an inordinate amount of time waiting in line to pee. As much as we love modern design, we loathe bathroom designers who go overboard and ignore the whole form over function mantra, since, well, you came here to take care of business not admire the scenery. Notwithstanding fussy bathroom fixtures, we do think it's rather nice to do our business in an aesthetically interesting environment. FAB loves herself some bathroom design that doesn't get in the way but still pushes the envelope or tickles her whimsy. Cases in point: the men's room at the Royalton Hotel in Midtown Manhattan, the mystery stall doors at Bar 89, the aesthetically pleasurable sinks at Sushi Samba, and on and on and on. Edge Designs is a company run by all women that designs office interiors. They recently had an opportunity to do a project in NYC where the client offered the women of this company a "free hand" in all design aspects. The client was also a company that was run by all female execs. It's nice to see some people still have a sense of humor.

PETA nails Paris.

Willie Nelson releases latest hit: "Cowboys Are Frequently, Secretly (Fond of Each Other)."

Cheney to speak out. To Fox News.

Meet Rufus. FAB was rooting for the goldie.

Like an impeccably choreographed pas de deux, the publicists deny the split.

Bruce Willis takes on God Oprah.

Kelly Osbourne is losing it.

Stylus talks Neutral Milk.

Cable and Tweed has the Of Montreal Variety show track by track. Go grab it.

Sean Preston can't poop.

Kiefer may spoof 24.

Mogwai team up with Zizou.

San Francisco Zoo offers sex tour.

Introducing Blink Design.

Tropolism announces the first open-sourced architectural contest, Your Hidden City. Post your entries on flickr.

New Walkmen drops May 23rd. In other news, Marcata Studios sacrificed to hungry Lions.

Check out the Garfleck spawn. Don't they look happy?

Atlanta still putting the moves on NASCAR.

Warner Music's digital sales doing better.

FAB wants to Stir It Up.

The Subways don't get kicked in the nuts by Pitchfork. But that ain't exactly a beejer either.

Brit Awards tonight.

Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Iron Hero (But Never Really Got Around To Asking).

Oliver Stone ready to take on the WTC.

Who woulda thunk?

At first, the British mistook the Strokes for a bunch of nerdy guys from New York which, um, oh nevermind.

Ron O. Revlon dips into Jr. Barkin. In other news, Ellen Barkin cleared a cool $20 million for 6 years of work. Not too shabby.

Gay filmmakers explore Israel's role as both top and bottom.

Pitchfork interviews Jens Lekman.

Brangelina to live FAB's dream.

In other news, is Angelina altered?

In a sad day for FAB, the first lady of Southern cooking has passed at the ripe ole age of 89. Please pass the pork.

Sample the new Flaming Lips.

And the award for the worst musical achievement in the last year goes to...

In other news, Pitchfork kicks Elefant in the nuts.

The Olympic approved Jetstream deluxe fur penismuffler, for those really cold days. (via towleroad)

NASCAR driver suddenly meets Captain Obvious.

TSG has Dick's report.

In other news, Jeb Bush makes a funny.

It seems Fergie may actually be a woman after all.

Has Kate Moss relapsed?

US government less impressed with democracy when its team doesn't win.

Pro beach volleyball headed for Atlanta thanks to all our, um, beaches and stuff.

Madonna to wash her hands.

Not just a bitch, but also a slut.

The Independent reviews CYHSY's live show. Yeah, remember them?

Seacrest out with a real live female.

Fake Scientists talk about the Grammys.

Say hello to Brandon Routh. Hello, Brandon.

Lollapalooza confirms for 3 days.

Sheriff's deputy Hulk.

Did you dress your dog in a bee costume and then lose him?
If so, he's at the Douglas County Animal Shelter. 770-942-5961
Or contact Beedogs.

Can we all please take a moment to consider the state of denim in this country? Being of Asian extraction, I'm fairly confident that the depth and height of my ass is average at best, if not on the diminutive side. This belief about my relative position in the pantheon of ass-size was confirmed by a kind man who told me to get my "flat ass off the bar" one fine evening many years ago while I may or may not have been shaking it atop the bar at SoHA. The year is no longer 1999. And as such, there is no reason that jeans not otherwise designated as "low-rise" or "hoochie mama" should cause a nice Asian girl to impersonate Super Mario and his funny little brother every time she bends down to pick something up off the floor. And surely society at large does not need to be regularly exposed to this manner of atrocity. Nor should one under the age of 45 and residing in a bustling metropolis be forced to sport full-rise Wranglers or anything otherwise pleated. Let us all urge the denim industry to go back to the drawing board and report to the front office with something better.

If anybody has the new number for favorite FAB establishment Milk and Honey, please email me. Those sneaky bastard genius bartenders done up and got a new one while we were busy ogling the new Taco Bell items.

Jessica Alba. Cover. Playboy. FAB wonders what's inside.

Emo Care Bears (via Best Week Ever)

Inman Park tightasses form Graffiti Eradication Team. Feh.

The Daily News exposes Bobby Brown's kids' Myspace profiles.

Most of Glide's 10 to Watch in 2006 already came.

Gael Greene plated Clint Eastwood back in the day.

Hall & Oates do Will & Grace.
French fry encrusted corn dogs brought to you by Korea, naturally.

Male whales much like men.

Bloombie fires city employee for playing Solitaire. Free Cell so much better.

After slamming the White Stripes Coke sellout, Oasis sells soul to AT&T.

Paper deeply regrets publishing "Meth Made Easy" cover story.

Government documents indicate the obvious.

Diana DeGarmo joins the cast of Hairspray.

Athens Exchange reviews Kill Gordon and Sovus Radio.

The Arctic Monkeys heart Richard Ashcroft.

Arctic Monkeys: The Movie.

Joy Division: The Movie.

Kanye fancies himself Biblical.

Hillary Duff's chicklets. Discuss.

Josh Hartnett thought Pearl Harbor sucked too.

How to fold a fitted sheet. Thanks.

Kiss Atlanta hearts Andrew Bird.

Let's talk about Indie Rock bands with "Wolf" in their names.

Listen to Panic! At the Disco. Coming soon to the Masquerade.

Tonight Engineering, Tora Tora Tora, and Girls on Film will be at Lennys. Stick around after the show for the Trashed Dance Party Two Year Anniversary.

The Rewinds will be at the 10 High with the Actual, the Gigs, and Aviator.

Saturday night Andrew Bird will be performing at Eyedrum for the Acanthus Arts show.

Local sweethearts Of Montreal will be kicking up a storm at the Variety.

Also that night is the Art Papers 7th annual Art Auction at Mason Murer Fine Art. The silent auction will feature hundreds of renowned & emerging contemporary artists from across the U.S. and abroad. Hors d'oeuvres provided by Fritti, Rolling Bones, Sun In My Belly, Sotto Sotto, The The Sun Dial Restaurant, Bar & View and Warren Huntley Presents. Official after party at Bazzaar Midtown.
Tickets $20 online, $25 at the door.

FAB recommends heading to the Loft to catch Nada Surf, Rogue Wave, and King of France.

Goodnight Records is having a showcase at the Drunken Unicorn featuring the Orphins, the Close, and the Press.

Also, Textbook will be at the Earl with League of Evil and From June Forward.

Stripping for Tom Ford is so hot right now.

Ashley Olsen: crazed troll.

Popbitch blind item: Which popstar, egged on by Stella McCartney, "accidentally" stubbed her cigarette out on Heather Mills wooden foot at her and Macca's wedding?

Naomi Campbell's "tongue too big for her mouth", forehead too big for her face.

CaCee Cobb finally nails Nick. Jessica less than thrilled.

Massive Attack grows.

The Killers' next effort to be more American, whatever that means.

From the makers of Hampster Dance comes Mohammad Dance. Yeah.

Kiss Atlanta interviews Engineering.

Turning the tables, Katie Couric gets crapped upon. Watch the video.

Apparently the Grammy's were last night. But you weren't watching either. Anyway, Hollywood Rag has pictures of the famous people all dressed up which is all that really matters anyway.

Built to Spill at the Variety May 12th.

Ben Harper prepares to dump new stuff on the public.

FAB sadly notes the passing of the tortilla chip inventor.

Sign up now for the Air Guitar Championship next week at the 40 Watt.


Retarded man can't ride moped again.

Benicio rides again.

Ryan Adams reels her in.

Apparently ugly patterns are back at Bryant Park only this time they're, like, totally edgy and new and stuff.

Flaming Lips take on pop culture.

Pete Doherty plays "freedom gig" in London celebrating his brave triumph over state oppression and whatnot.

Indie Interviews J. Tillman.

For female rappers, it all comes down to tits and ass.

While I was hoping that they were also going to be covering the theme song instead of overlaying with their own music, the Pants Pants Pants Full House Intro music video still totally kills. (via What We All Want)

FAB has no idea how this is even humanly possible. It pretty much blows our world to bits, but verily God has smiled upon us this day. Let us all take a moment to thank the Baby Jesus for the magic of clinical trials and how they speak unto us the truth.

And in related news, how come nobody alerted me to the return of the Taco Bell Crunchwrap™ Supreme. I mean, everybody knows that the Double Decker Taco is FAB's most favoritist Taco Bell item ever and Taco Bell is one of FAB's most favoritist legal entities ever, so naturally the Double Deckeresque Crunchwrap™ Supreme and I are a match made in heaven.

Tonight the place to be is Art Mix's Shaken & Stirred downtown art series at the Mark, a mixed media show showcasing national and local artists under the age of 40. Featured artists include John Tindel, Lena Reznik, Blink, Kermin, Chris Parsons, and Lord Yatta.
Doors at 7pm.

Sure the Rolling Stones will be at Philips Arena, but it's not like you have tickets anyway. If you must have music, FAB recommends catching Athens' very danceable new trio Engineering at the Drunken Unicorn.

I don't have any shows for you tonight in Atlanta, but for you Athenians, two of Atlanta's best up and coming rock acts, Sovus Radio and Kill Gordon, will be tearing it up at Tasty World tonight with the Workouts. Check them out.

Scarlett and Keira take it off for Graydon.

Street art in the former USSR.

From Cocaine to Foie Gras. Seriously.

Watch Ok Go's funny dancing video which has actually been out for months but for some reason is just now resurfacing on the internets.

Cat Power cancels US tour.

Atlanta Music Guide features the Modern Society.

Rough and tumble Paris on Paris action.

Pitchfork reviews new Prefuse 73.

Atlanta hosts Mrs. King's going away party. AJC coverage.

Reasons for visiting Macon Georgia (via metblogs via goldenfiddle).

My Morning Jacket to release demos.

Stereophonics to release live bits.

Princess Kiko gets knocked up, upstages Michiko.

The Beatles edge out Shakespeare and the local pub for most British.

Brit needs a carseat.

Jack Black raised in a sex cult.

Ipods in the office.


Madge pushes Mimi out of the Grammy's opening slot.

Stream the Darkness.

Daisy snarks back at Sienna.

Reese's pesky paparazzo bites the big one.

Kiss Atlanta reviews the Selmanaires.

Neko Case to hit the Variety on April 14th.

Bodyguard shot at Busta Rhymes' shoot.

Vice's Dos and Don'ts.

NFL censors Stones.

Pitchfork takes T.Rex by storm.

Lance and Sheryl throw in the towel.

Nicole Kidman throws in the towel.

SXSW Film Festival lineup.

Smashing Pumpkins rise again?

Massive Attack plans massive attack.

The NYTimes discovers Sarajevo. FAB's Sarajevo pics on flickr.

Franz Ferdinand confirm the Fallen.

New Belle and Sebastian lookin' pretty good.

Go on a Model Safari.

Kelly Clarkson channels Xtina.

Mugatu Lagerfeld disses Di.

George Clooney does Groucho Marx.

Marvin Gaye biopic in the works.

Atlanta prepares to send off Mrs. King.

Face transplant recipient speaks.

Bob Dylan heads to the studio.

Pitchfork burps at Jose Gonzalez EP.

Enter the publicists.

Enter the publicists.

Colin Meloy does Shirley Collins.

Watch the new Death Cab Crooked Teeth video.

Death Cab to do Atlanta sans Franz. Anybody know how to work the presale?

On Sale Today:
The Strokes at the Tabernacle on Wednesday, March 8th.

Dinosaur Jr. at the Variety Playhouse on Saturday, April 4th.

On Sale Tomorrow:
R. Kelly at the Fox Theatre on Monday, March 20th.

The Black Crowes at the Fox Theatre on Tuesday, March 14th.

Tonight FAB recommends checking out Sovus Radio, All the Saints, Kill Gordon, and Overwhelmed downstairs at the Masquerade.

Sovus Radio will be doing duty tonight also appearing later in the night at Lenny's to help kick off A Fir-Ju Well's three month tour.

Also, Arc the Finger Records will be presenting their "Dynamic Derelict" series at the Drunken Unicorn with Minamina Goodsong, Glue, and Alpha Noise Project.

In Athens, FAB recommends checking out the Hold Steady at Tasty World with Swearing at Motorists and the Plastic Constellations.

Tomorrow night, that same show comes to the Earl.

Feist (yuck!) will be at the Variety Playhouse with Jason Collett.

The Selmanaires, the Flakes, and the Liverhearts will be at the Drunken Unicorn.

Modern Skirts will be at the 10 High with Libras and the Carter Administration.

The Coachella lineup is up. Check it out. Tickets go on sale Saturday.

Sienna may not be as dumb as she dresses.

Jessica and Nick "sort out issues" in a hotel room.

The indie rock cookbook.

Because the first child worked wonders.

Up the Tree has William Shatner's video of Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds.

Alabamans rally to save the beer.

FAB hero hounds 26 grilled cheese sandwiches in 10 minutes. Perhaps we should move to the competative level.

Pregnant Katie Holmes in some sort of, uh, bodysuit?

Vic Chesnutt, David Bazan, Mark Eitzel, and Will Johnson talk to the UGA's Red and Black.

The Continental closes to live music.

Puppy mules.

HP5 to begin filming next week.


Newsweek. Arctic. Monkeys. Blah.

Bonnaroo disses the hippies.


Noise Pop looks neat.

Madonna and the Gorillaz to open Grammys.

Prince Harry is Baghdad bound.

Coretta Scott King funeral next Tuesday in Lithonia.

Inside the Carolina Panthers cheerleader scandal.

Boy George pleads not guilty to drugs.

Arctic Monkeys try to combat scalping.

Pardon me while I wallow in a pile of my own shit. If anybody knows of anyone in Atlanta who would be willing to hire a bright but wayward Ivy League grad who has little interest in continuing with this graduate school charade, let me know.

Likes: music, food, art, media, public interest
Dislikes: math, finance, apple, jobs requiring an MPH or beyond